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general hospital.biz
Individual Points I Want to Talk About |
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MONDAY 01. Don't these
writers know how to come up with anything different? Example: DOES
THIS SOUND FAMILIAR? 02. Now let's fast
forward to today: 03. Don't you wonder how much money these writers make? Did we REALLY need to get stuck with this story all over again - and so soon? 04. And while we're on the subject, if you wanted to take over Port Charles, and you wanted to kill off one of the prime enforcers in the business, would you be so stupid as to tell Jerry Jax to do it? Claudia WAS stupid, and you've seen what it got her. But this is Karpov. He's been wanting and raving about how important it is that he take over Port Charles, and how he wants to do it without starting an all out mob war. If you're that serious, you go out and hire an assassin as good as Morgan - and Jerry ain't it. 05. Karpov says to Sonny, "I'm asking you to be reasonable. Honor the terms of our deal, and no one has to lose." Excuse me, but I thought the terms of the deal were clearly laid out, and they consisted of NO DRUGS. I don't know about you, but personally I'm shocked, SHOCKED DO YOU HEAR ME, that Karpov did not keep his end of the deal. 06. When is Nikolas going to get over Emily, look around, and start smelling the roses? EXCUSE ME, Nadine? Let's see, Nikolas was in love with Emily for how many years? SHE HASN'T EVEN BEEN DEAD 10 MONTHS, and already Nadine is expecting Nikolas to be out trolling? Tell me, Nadine, you're head over heels in love with Nik here. Let's suppose he fell in love with you, and the two of you were deliriously happy for a year or so, and then Nikolas was murdered. Would YOU be out trolling after a few months? 07. Maxie and Claudia are the two smartest people on this show. If I were in trouble, and I needed someone to watch by back, and go into battle with me, it would be Maxie and Claudia. If it weren't for Maxie, Spinelli would be up shit's creek. 08. JOHNNY, YOU'RE NOT HELPING. If Lulu's got post traumatic stress, she needs help, not that continuous crap about how she's not to blame, and it's only natural that she should be freaking out. And then there's my personal favorite ... LULU, YOU HAD NO OTHER CHOICE. You've been telling her this stuff for weeks. So how's it been working for you? From where I sit, Lulu's getting worse every day. And also from where I sit, she's not really even fighting it. There's a part of her that WANTS to be like her mother. And there's a part of her that WANTS to go crazy and spend the rest of her life in a rocking chair, screaming to get out, because there's a part of her that knows she IS guilty of killing Logan, and this is how she's punishing herself. 09. You know,
Nikolas, for a guy who's supposed to be smart, how can you look so
shocked when Elizabeth tells you that just maybe Lulu WANTS to be with
Johnny. 10. You know, I am
so sick and tired of hearing people takes sides about whether Sonny's
need for power will force him back into the mob. THERE ARE LOTS OF
SITUATIONS WHERE ONE CAN WIELD POWER. Just ask Jax. You could ask
Jerry, too, but I wouldn't get involved in that. 11. Spinelli, when in the hell are you make Maxie SHUT UP? My god, you never get a word in edgewise. 12. Carly, SHUT UP. When Carly asked Claudia why they should believe that she didn't set the whole thing up, Claudia should have said, "If I'd set the whole thing up, I would have made sure the shooter was aiming at YOU and your big mouth." 13. AM I REALLY SUPPOSED TO BELIEVE THAT JOHNNY ZACCHARA SAID TO LULU, "Did you draw your bath water?" 14. Spinelli, when you got your stupid PI's license, did you ever think about what private investigators do? Being a PI is like being a detective for the police: 90% of what you do is boring, boring, boring legwork. It's putting the pieces together and doing your homework so that you can figure out what's going on. Regardless of what TV shows and movies tell you,, and what you fabricate about Jason's life, private investigators get the guy (and the girl) BY FIGURING OUT WHO DID IT, NOT BY BEATING PEOPLE UP AND SHOWING PEOPLE WHAT A STUD YOU ARE. Maxie is always having to come to your rescue because you're always trying to show your physical prowess, not your intellectual prowess. And while we're on the subject, just how does Maxie save your butt? Dows she do the kung fu stuff and leave everybody bleeding in the dust? NO; she uses her brain. Bottom line is, before you go into any situation, start asking yourself what you're going to say if you get caught. 15. Nadine, how can anyone in their right mind, who's been around as long as you have, not realize that Nikolas was "being intimate" with an old friend. 16. Hey Diane,
what kind of an idiot are YOU being? Sonny should get Max in that room
immediately, and get this thing with Diane settled once and for all. 17. You know what Lulu, I'm not going to spend the rest of my life, watching you go from one hair-brained scheme to another, and then freaking out every time and deciding they need to get the chair next to your mom ready. 18. Why does Kate say that September 26th is less than a month away, when it's August 11th? 19. JUMP, LULU; GIVE US ALL A BREAK.
TUESDAY 20. Alexis says to
Maxie, "Since you spend so much time working with Lulu, I thought
you might know something that would help this case." Well,
Alexis, I'm sorry, but you're wrong on two counts. 21. Cody, how do we go from Sonny throwing drugs into the river and telling Karpov by violating the rules of their relationship (meaning no drugs) their deal is over ... to Cody telling Jason Sonny supervised the operation? 22. WHY DO PEOPLE ALWAYS THINK THAT IF THEY TELL SOMEONE "I ALREADY GAVE MY STATEMENT" that it will suffice? Have you ever seen a situation where a person said, "I already told the detective what happened," and the cops said, "Oh, okay. Have a nice day?" It's almost as bad as when the cops or DA responds with that old saw about how sometimes repeating what you saw can help. 23. I've been saying for months, Robyn should be having TWINS. Only one? How disappointing. 24. Alexis says she can't do conditions. BULLSHIT. DAs do conditions all the time. And thank goodness Nikolas stood up to Alexis and her crap about how he's putting her in a bad position. TOO DAMN BAD, Alexis. Frankly, I don't give a shit what kind of position you're in. If you want information about Lulu and Johnny, you WILL agree to my terms, or have a lousy day. 25. Spinelli with a gun? Neither Spinelli, nor the world is safe when he has a gun. I agree with Jason. You don't get a gun, you idiot, until you can prove you can use it without killing or maiming yourself or anyone else in your path.
WEDNESDAY 26. Max, you're a great guy, but whether Mr. Corinthos is available or not available is not for you to judge. I doubt seriously that Sonny told you to stand at the door, and if Trevor comes knocking, to tell him Sonny's not available. Obviously, if Max goes inside Sonny's office and comes back out, then Sonny's in there. I don't know how you fix that, but how about installing a security camera, so Sonny could see who was there, and then make the decision himself about whether he wanted to see the person or not. Then, Max, you wouldn't look so ridiculous when Sonny comes out and tells you to let Trevor in. 27. Alexis, either you've told Violet not to let Kristina go anywhere near Anthony, or you haven't. If you haven't, you're a total idiot. If you have, then fire her immediately. Or, if she says she didn't know what to do, THEN EDUCATE HER AND FAST. Either that, or hire a bodyguard to keep a respectable distance. That will get you in less trouble than putting a bullet right between Violet's eyes. 28. Kate needs to be told that she doesn't just get to walk into Sonny's office like he's sitting there all day long doing crosswords. Kate is making the very mistake she got all pissed off at Sonny for. Sonny used to treat her like her job was just something she dabbled in for fun; something that wasn't particularly important, so that he could just drop in on her at any time, ask her to go away or do something at any time; that she could just drop whatever she was doing, and go wherever he said. Now she's doing that very same thing to him. WHAT DOES SHE THINK MAX IS THERE FOR? WHEN MAX SAYS NO, IT'S NO. 29. And while we're on the subject, Max, I'm sure Diane would testify to your sexual prowess, but sometimes I wonder. Do you have ANY BALLS? Sonny is in his office with Trevor, of all people. They're not discussing a dinner engagement, or whether one of them can get good seats for a baseball game, Max, AND YOU KNOW IT. YOU KNOW THAT WHATEVER THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT, IS VERY LIKELY SOMETHING THAT SONNY DOESN'T WANT KATE TO KNOW, AND STILL YOU HAVEN'T GOT THE BALLS TO KEEP HER OUT OF THE OFFICE. Sometimes you are really useless. 30. I'd believe that was really Robyn's stomach if it ever went up and down when she took a breath. And what the doctor (she's been gone so long I can't even recall her name right now) was wiping off was beyond me, since there was clearly NOTHING on Robyn's fake stomach. Maybe GH had the stomach on loan and had to return it to another soap without the gunk all over it. 31. After Trevor leaves, Kate asks Sonny what his meeting with Trevor was all about. She's got her arms folded, and she looks like a grade school teacher I used to have. Actually, her posture reminds me of a lot of teachers I used to have. Kate, let me clue you in. Sometimes Sonny is going to have meetings that are NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. Does the phrase NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS hold any meaning for you? And don't ask Sonny like you're about to scold him if you don't get the "right" answer. Sonny, I do not understand why the stupid writers insist on making your office in your house where Diane can come in and spill the beans, or Kate can come in and start giving you those suspicious glares. Or give her a choice: either respect my meetings (meaning stay the hell out of them), or I'll move my operations someplace else where you will not be invited. 32. OKAY, NOW WE HAVE A REALLY INTERESTING SITUATION. Kate (and everyone else) has been on Sonny's ass to get out of the business. And every time the guy even looks at a black suit, all these people are giving him shit. NOW KATE ASKS THE QUESTION I'VE BEEN ASKING FOR WEEKS: WHY CAN'T THESE KIDS BE TRACKED DOWN? I guarantee you that all it would take is one phone call, and Brucie walks. Never mind, you won't understand that. What I'm saying is EXACTLY what Sonny said: IF HE WERE STILL IN CHARGE, HE WOULD HAVE TRACKED DOWN THOSE KIDS IN A DAY. AND I BELIEVE HIM because I've seen it done for real. So that makes you wonder, doesn't it? Why hasn't Jason put together his resources and found Johnny and Lulu? HE HASN'T DONE A THING TO FIND THEM.
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WEDNESDAY - Continued 33. But I digress. Here's the point. Everyone wants Sonny out of the business UNTIL HE CAN BE HELPFUL. If, by going back "into the business (sort of)" he could find Lulu and Johnny, don't you think Nikolas (who could have used his money to find them already, too, if he'd really wanted to), or Luke, or any of the Quartermanes, or Elizabeth, or even Lucky or Carly - don't you think they'd encourage Sonny to do anything to find Lulu and get her home before somebody blows her head off, or she takes a set next to her mother? 34. I hope this Lulu I'm-going-crazy- crap is over soon, because I find myself fast-forwarding more and more. That's cause every time I stop, all I hear is the same crap. 35. Why is our Little Chickie constantly crawling through the window to see these days? What did I miss? 36. Hey, Jax, OF COURSE Carly can say that she's happier with you in her life. Carly always has to have a man in her life, a very rich, very handsome, very powerful man, that she can emasculate whenever she feels like it. If you weren't there, who would she fight with? IF you don't believe me, look at what she says next: "And sometimes love is messy and it's complicated. Can you handle that, Jax, or am I going to be one more wife you walk out on?" Boy, that's love if I ever heard it, Carly. It only took you about thirty seconds to start emasculating Jax again. "Messy and complicated?" Is that what you call what you constantly do. You make it sound like Jax is pissed at you because you bought the wrong shampoo. I CAN'T WAIT UNTIL HE FINDS OUT "MESSY AND COMPLICATED" MEANS I SCREWED MY EX-HUSBAND IN THE BACK OF HIS LIMO, and then tried everything possible to make you feel like shit because you kissed Kate. (Sometimes I think it's too bad they dropped the story about Jax and Kate supposedly being romantically involved.) 37. EXCUSE ME, but as much as I can't stand Dr. Hunter, Maxie has no business being in the examining room. She's preventing Hunter from doing his examination, and I would have her removed on that basis. And this crap about Maxie calling Nikolas is just that. And I would keep Spinelli there until he allowed the examination to be done, no matter how long it took. 38. SEE, SO HERE'S ALEXIS TALKING TO SONNY, AND WHAT IS SHE DOING? Because it's in HER interests, she's pulling Sonny back into the mob by telling him that Anthony is threatening Kristina. SO WHAT'S SONNY SUPPOSED TO DO? She tells him, "I'm trusting you to handle this and do ANYTHING you need to do to protect our daughter." These people are amazing.
THURSDAY 39. WAIT A MINUTE. I distinctly remember when Jason had that tumor or whatever and he would not have surgery. It wasn't Robyn who made him do it, it was SAM. In fact, Sam was the only person who stayed by his side, and nudged and nudged until he gave in. Everyone else just about gave up. It was Sam who should be given the credit for Jason's recovery, not Robyn. That's bullshit. 40. So Robyn decides that it was Jason, after Stone's death, that made her realize that there could be a future. So how did she repay that? She opened her big mouth and told AJ that Michael was his and not Jason's. I remember how Carly and Jason HATED her for that. That was the reason she left Port Charles and went to Paris. And now Jason has decided that if he had not kept the secret, Michael wouldn't be in the position he is in today. Oh my god, now we're going back all those years? This is ridiculous. Frankly, Michael would probably still be alive, but he'd be a total mess, just like all the other Quartermanes. And with AJ as his father, god only knows how the kid would have turned out. And if Michael had never been born he wouldn't be in this spot, either. 41. Let me get this straight. Little Chickie knows that Johnny and Lulu are on the run, AND SHE WANTS TO CALL 911? Does the elevator go to the top floor? 42. Robyn, telling the biggest, baddest mob enforcer on the planet that you want him to be part of your baby's life certainly doesn't seem to be what the baby's father wanted to hear. It wouldn't be incorrect for Patrick to point out what happened to Michael, and make it clear to Robyn that bringing THEIR (defined and HIS and well as HER) baby around Sonny or Jason might not be a very good idea. Maybe Robyn would like to chat with Alexis about this subject. And then Robyn talks to Patrick, and tells him SHE AGREES THAT JASON SHOULDN'T BE ANYWHERE AROUND THEIR BABY. Nice, Robyn. 43. Jax, DO YOU EVER KEEP YOUR MIND ON BUSINESS? I can't remember the last time you had a meeting about Crimson and you didn't bail out mentally because you were caught up in yet another Carly psychodrama. If I were Kate, Id already be planning how to get rid of you if you can't keep your mind on business. How a big shot business tycoon like you is willing to admit that "And now you can't acknowledge all the hard work my staff has done in your absence because you're allowing Carly to make you feel guilty"??? Jesus. 44. So Carly, if your ankle is that bad, why are you drinking and not at the hospital? Couldn't you get a whole lot more sympathy that way? 45. My god, don't you want to throw up? Why is it that Carly can do whatever she pleases, and then the writers make everybody else fall all over themselves apologizing? Even when you think Jax has finally gotten the balls to stand up to her, he's unable to walk and chew gum at the same time because he's so overcome with GUILT? Frankly, on the one hand it might have been better if Carly had broken that ankle. At least then it would be unlikely that she'd be hobbling to rendezvous with Karpov. On the other hand, since Jax can't even concentrate because he left her with a boo boo, can you imagine what hoops Carly would have Jax jumping through if her ankle was really broken?
FRIDAY 46. Johnny, you're going about this all wrong. Lulu's too whacked out to understand anything, and you should know that. You hate your father; you know you can't call Claudia without your father knowing; you and Sonny don't exactly see eye to eye; and Trevor is out of the question. SO CALL JASON. BETTER YET, CALL NIKOLAS. Get someone out there who can take responsibility for Lulu, because if you aren't careful, in the real world she would get you killed. 47. "I don't care if I'm crazy; I'm NOT going to be the reason you go to prison." There's something really weird about this sentence, but I haven't figured it out yet. 48. Isn't it wonderful how Lulu shifts gears when it's to her advantage? Ever since she killed Logan, she's been telling Johnny how she's turning into her mother. And no matter what Johnny says, that's all Lulu keeps saying ... "This is exactly what happened to my mother." She's also told Johnny that one of the reasons her mother got so messed up was because Luke didn't get her the professional help she needed. Ah, so now all of a sudden, the situation ISN'T the same. MAKE UP YOUR MIND LULU. 49. To be fair, however, Lulu does have a point when she says that she will not get better if she knows Johnny is locked up paying for something that she did. 50. Maybe it's not admissible as evidence, but if Johnny's so worried that Lulu's confession will be seen as nothing more that a pathetic attempt to protect Johnny, Lulu can take a lie detector test. 51. WHEN IS THIS DAMN MAGAZINE GOING TO LAUNCH? 52. You know Carly, if anyone understands the nuances of setting someone up, it's you. Kate didn't call or come over and demand that Jax fly to Paris with her, for crying out loud. She had a problem, and she asked him to make a phone call. So what? He wasn't under your thumb for 10 minutes, so Kate has got some big plan going? If I were going to try to steal away Jax, I certainly wouldn't do it in his living room with his wife there. She didn't even ask him to leave the house, Carly. WHAT WOULD HAVE HAPPENED IF JASON HAD CALLED YOU AND SAID HE HAD A PROBLEM AND NEEDED YOUR IMMEDIATE HELP? You would have been out of that house so fast (forget about the stupid ankle for now) Jax's head would have spun from the draft. You would have left, and you would have lied about where you were going. And it would have made no difference if Jax was in the middle of trying to reconcile with you BECAUSE IT WAS JASON. 53. WHAT BULLSHIT. Jason tells Elizabeth that "I've tried every way I know how to make Sonny understand I don't blame him fro Michael ANY MORE THAN I BLAME MYSELF." Well, from what I've seen since Michael's shooting, that means YOU BLAME SONNY A LOT. 54. And while we're on the subject of pop psychology, Jason, I'd suggest you stop acting like you have all the answers, and they all point to Sonny as the "culprit". You have all kinds of issues regarding your own father, who you treated like shit and abandoned, and then when he was dying and asking for you, you were too busy shooting at James Craig - WHO, INCIDENTALLY, YOU NEVER TOOK ANY REVENGE ON FOR YOUR FATHER'S DEATH. And then there are all those issues about not being able to be with Jake. You never gave the time of day to your father, and you can't give the time of day to your son, and we're not even talking about how you denied AJ all those years with Michael. If you and Elizabeth think that all this baggage had NOTHING to do with you ganging up with Carly against Sonny and making him give up his boys, you are out of your mind. 55. GOOD FOR YOU,
MIKE. Finally, they give you something to say, and it's right on:
"Do you really believe, Sonny, that Jason would stand by and do
nothing if Anthony Zacchara moved again you or anyone you cared
about?" There was a time when Sonny would have said no
immediately. But those days are gone. I think Sonny actually thinks
that Jason would prefer it if Sonny was dead. Let's take a minute to
consider who the people are that Sonny cares about. Let's leave Carly
out of this because we know how Jason feels about her. Jason is clear
on wanting to keep the peace. So, whether it's Karpov or Anthony
Zacchara ... 56. Jason:
"Sonny, if you think anything I've done since the night Michael
was shot has been about making you pay, pr punishing you, it
hasn't." BULLSHIT. 57. GREAT LINE OF THE WEEK: (Nikolas to Anthony): "You don't scare me; I've been dealing with murdering sociopaths my entire life." 58. EXCELLENT! NIKOLAS AND CLAUDIA TOGETHER AGAIN. They make an absolutely fabulous twosome. DO SOMETHING WITH THEM BEFORE SARAH DECIDES TO LEAVE.
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